(to the tune of High Heel Sneakers, by various artists)

Put on your wetsuit Doofus
If you’re gonna surf today
Put on your wetsuit Doofus
If you’re gonna surf today
If you don’t put on your wetsuit
You’ll freeze your butt, that’s’ what I say

Put on your five mil booties
’Cause the water’s fifty two
Put on your five mil booties
’Cause the water’s fifty two
If you don’t put on those booties
Your toes are gonna turn all blue

Put in your ear plugs Doofus
I hear the air is forty eight
Put in your ear plugs Doofus
I hear the air is forty eight
’Cause if you don’t put in those ear plugs
You know your head is gonna ache

Lyrics by Mike Clancy